i'm still is the js before....

yesterday,hang out with my franz...
he gotta b my second cicerone...
he always bring me go the showplace...
he is the third franz i got...
he is handsome...but...not the people that i want...
so,i just can b franz with him...
we go to the singapore ''stadium''...
before we arrived there...i really think thats just a stadium...
actually it not...
it got a big shopping centre...
it contain skating rink...cinema...karaokae...bowling alley...
i so pleasure to have a handsome franz...
hahahahaha...he is a johor guys...
he fluent in the english...and the plantar massage...
he is fall in love to me...
he say want to chase me...lol..
whats wrong with this year??
the god make me lovelorn...now?
think to replace my hurt??
ohh..pls...dun b like that...
i really only think to have more franz...
dun give more peach blossom again...
thats enough...
actually...sometimes...i still can feel that hurt...
because..wen hao is really bring me a big hurt n hatching...
scared to fall in love...
scared to hurt again...
scared the ppl that chase me...
watever we just franz...i always will keep some distance from them...
it not means i'm LC...
it just...a hurt that i always can't walk out...


just now...
while i hear the song of JJ''ji de''...
suddenly...i'm crying again...
i known i'm idiot...i'm stupid...
i always tell myself...dun think..dun mind all about him...
i so hate myself...y i always can't keep my word?
y i'm so weak...watever he treat me so bad...
in my heart...he still perfect...
watever,how i hate...how i tell everyone his bad...
but...in my mind...he still is the good person...
i'm clear..he is change...not before wen hao anymore...
not the one that i love anymore...
but when i looking theirs sweet pic...
my heart is break...hard to breathe...
tears is endless...pain......heart pain....


when i really can put down all of this damn things?
i wanna my normal life...
god...if u can here me...
can u give me the one that same like him to me?
i din care the look...the heigh...
i just wanna that feel only...
at least...i can forget him as temporary...


when i can stop my tears??
no one can help me...

singing by js choong...XD

may b it no nice...
because i just record for play play only~~hahaha~~
enjoyed it~~
cover by S.H.E 我们怎么了...

the next song is cover by rainie...

 

need to prove it...

i'm beginning my self-educated...
because...i really can't the english course here...
if i waiting myself to get the course...not so,i start for myself..
looking for my all my franz ...
all is begin learn the different things...
graphic design...account IT...mass media...hairdressing...LCCI...
i think out i'm slow...
watever,i get more money than them...
still unhappy,because..can't get the different feel here...
i wanna b a nurse...
but, this is dream it's hard to b come true...
so how??
what can i do??
feel lonely...feel unreality...no fact...
when i can get a friends like my secondary school franz??

i really need a truly friends...not a hunter...
pls...i really no need the love now...
i just want my normal life...
gotta a new friends again...isn't friends??
just few days...then say wanna to chase me...
izit funny?? i'm not a fool anymore...
may b have many person feel i'm still is a child..==..
but, i'm not...
dun easily to say the word of ''love''...
i just simplely to wanna get some friends..no other means...
i hope he will known that so...


so miss my family...my parents..my sis...my bro...
my baobao...my kar yian...n all of 5Rfriends...


actually,still can get some happy here...
because,here i have the peter uncle..
he is a funny guys...hahahaha...
likve to playing...kidding with him...
he always like to acting...hahaha...
he is different than i think before...
so suit...hahaha...
so thank you for him...because always make me b happy everyday...
thank you so much...
so...i must b hardworking for u...
less talking...more working...
i promise...!

DissapoinT...

T^T...

25th june 2011...
my super idol ''JJ''will coming bck singapore stage the performance...
sibeh good what...T^T...
but...
i think  i dun have chance to get there...disappoint!!!><
haiz....i'm already a long time ago...
because that day is saturday...
my restaurant must b so busy...so...
i can't to leave there...hmmm..T^T...so sad...
too sad...very sad lorrr....
no chance to see JJ's performance...got damn!!!

AlMoSt...

today...i gv xiao wen a call...
actually i'm sick today...
headache...@.@...lol..hate it...
it nice to talk with him...
he is nothing to changes...hahaha..
still love to keep smile...
may b because love nourish...make he becum more happy then before...
so good...
the thing that i feel unbelieveble...
thats is...he keep attend for my blog...
so touching...
whatever...i dun want to crab his weal...
becoz he really treat me so good before...

actually...today...my tears almost to flow...
when i hear his voice...the familiar voice...
suddenly, i felt...the ppl that more care about me are lost...
well...i noe the girl treat him more than me...
so i'm nothing...
i'm really is a bad guy~~
leave me~gv up to me~~thats a good decision~~
i won't hurt the ppl tha treat me so good~
now...the thing that i can do for u is...
get away from u...sometimes gv u a call juz like a normal franz...
thats enough...
just wishes he can get the true love~~
gambateh yup!!


i get a message from my dear franz too~~
i so happy to get their sms~~
because i can noe that...i'm not alone...
i still have franz...
she say she feel so sorry because she is busy for her school work...
then she can't answer my called...
she so scared i will angry that...
hahaha...so cute...i won't la...
i noe ur guys is busy for your own school work what...
not like me...free like a cripple...shit!!

after i join with the society...
i gatta known the real live in everyone...
that cruel...realism...
make me in a trouble...
i just a normal guys...always think to simplicity to help other...
but...opposite...thats guy do wrong just will say is my wrong...
ever to say thank you to me...
i'm not really want to force anyone to say thank you for me...
but...i just simple to help someone...but they just smear me...
now i noe a word...
it's hard to be a good person...WTF!!
auntie!!this is the last time i smear to u!!
no next time!! stop to talk with me!!
i won't forgv u what!!

before...i am more idiot then now...
so now...i noe that...no one can protect me...
so i promise myself...must b protect myself avoid the injured...
watever got someone tell me ''just let me to protect u''...
i also won't trust it...because now! i just believe myself...
other...!? huh...watever u didn't tell the truth to me...
but dun lie me! i hate lies n promise!!

my deeply heart...

what happen to me??
already 3 months ago...
still feeling...something is lost in my life...
what thats??
love??
dream??
n i feel...the distance between my friends...
they all...try they hard to get their dream...
but...how about myself??
what i get when i working at here?
money?
shopping?
busy?
lonely?

i have regret the decision i take...
may be...i should study just like my friends...
so miss them...
last time...ah kit mama come to find me...
felt so sorry to him...
because i busy for my working...
less to accompany him...
sorry mum~XD
but...
have a part...i feel so dissapoint...
that is...
ah ling jealous i can meet ah kit mama...
i didn't means to rob her bf what~~><
i just pleasure n happy to meet some bercham at here...
i just hope...she will know me n ah kit mama..
we nothing...just normal franz...

other people...already happiness 3 months...
opposite...
i'm lonely sadly..few months...
too bad...
i always go sentosa ''SILOSO'' beach...
enjoy the sea wind...blew....blew...
it can gv me relax...
because...i always arm-twisting myself...

i gotta new decision recently...
i'm planning...
i wiil be back ipoh chinese new year...
n when i'm working almost 1 years...
i will resign my job...and go n have a nurse course...
just a plan...
i'm not adopt a big expectation of this dream...

and...
i hope all my ipoh friends can happy in everyday...
ah ling baba...fong yee..keya mami...eva ho mama...amy saw...bik ying...
kar yen ...elaine...jac cheng..yik lee...kee jing...
n the one most important in my life...my good good franz...my wife...
yen siew fongall 5R students...
miss u all so much much...